Kelly J
07-29-2013, 09:35 AM
This has to be passed on, it is just to good to keep to ourselves.
Craig's List Ad--Read it closely folks. A good one.
AN ACTUAL CRAIG'S LIST
PERSONALS AD
To the Guy Who Tried to Mug Me in Downtown Savannah night before last.
Date: 2010-09-27, 1:43 am. E.S.T.
I was the guy wearing the black Burberry jacket that you demanded that I hand over,
shortly after you pulled the knife on me and my girlfriend, threatening our lives. You
also asked for my girlfriend's purse and earrings.
I can only hope that you somehow come across this rather important message.
First, I'd like to apologize for your embarrassment; I didn't expect you to actually
crap in your pants when I drew my pistol after you took my jacket.. The evening
was not that cold, and I was wearing the jacket for a reason.. my girlfriend was
happy that I just returned safely from my 2nd tour as a Combat Marine in Afghanistan ..
She had just bought me that Kimber Custom Model 1911 ..45 ACP pistol for my
birthday, and we had picked up a shoulder holster for it that very evening.
Obviously you agree that it is a very intimidating weapon when pointed at your
head ... isn't it?!
I know it probably wasn't fun walking back to wherever you'd come from with crap
in your pants. I'm sure it was even worse walking bare-footed since I made you
leave your shoes, cell phone, and wallet with me. [That prevented you from calling
or running to your buddies to come help mug us again].
After I called your mother or "Momma" as you had her listed in your cell, I explained
the entire episode of what you'd done. Then I went and filled up my gas tank as well
as those of four other people in the gas station, -- on your credit card. The guy with
the big motor home took 153 gallons and was extremely grateful!
I gave your shoes to a homeless guy outside Vinnie Van Go Go's, along with all the cash
in your wallet. [That made his day!]
I then threw your wallet into the big pink "pimp mobile" that was parked at the curb .....
after I broke the windshield and side window and keyed the entire driver's side of the car.
Earlier, I managed to get in two threatening phone calls to the DA's office and one to the
FBI, while mentioning President Obama as my possible target.
The FBI guy seemed really intense and we had a nice long chat(I guess while he traced
your number etc.) ;In a way, perhaps I should apologize for not killing you ... but I feel
this type of retribution is a far more appropriate punishment for your threatened crime.
I wish you well as you try to sort through some of these rather immediate pressing issues,
and can only hope that you have the opportunity to reflect upon, and perhaps reconsider,
the career path you've chosen to pursue in life.. Remember, next time you might not be so lucky..
Have a good day!
Thoughtfully yours, Semper Fi, Alex
Probably don't have to ask you to forward this one,
it is priceless!
Craig's List Ad--Read it closely folks. A good one.
AN ACTUAL CRAIG'S LIST
PERSONALS AD
To the Guy Who Tried to Mug Me in Downtown Savannah night before last.
Date: 2010-09-27, 1:43 am. E.S.T.
I was the guy wearing the black Burberry jacket that you demanded that I hand over,
shortly after you pulled the knife on me and my girlfriend, threatening our lives. You
also asked for my girlfriend's purse and earrings.
I can only hope that you somehow come across this rather important message.
First, I'd like to apologize for your embarrassment; I didn't expect you to actually
crap in your pants when I drew my pistol after you took my jacket.. The evening
was not that cold, and I was wearing the jacket for a reason.. my girlfriend was
happy that I just returned safely from my 2nd tour as a Combat Marine in Afghanistan ..
She had just bought me that Kimber Custom Model 1911 ..45 ACP pistol for my
birthday, and we had picked up a shoulder holster for it that very evening.
Obviously you agree that it is a very intimidating weapon when pointed at your
head ... isn't it?!
I know it probably wasn't fun walking back to wherever you'd come from with crap
in your pants. I'm sure it was even worse walking bare-footed since I made you
leave your shoes, cell phone, and wallet with me. [That prevented you from calling
or running to your buddies to come help mug us again].
After I called your mother or "Momma" as you had her listed in your cell, I explained
the entire episode of what you'd done. Then I went and filled up my gas tank as well
as those of four other people in the gas station, -- on your credit card. The guy with
the big motor home took 153 gallons and was extremely grateful!
I gave your shoes to a homeless guy outside Vinnie Van Go Go's, along with all the cash
in your wallet. [That made his day!]
I then threw your wallet into the big pink "pimp mobile" that was parked at the curb .....
after I broke the windshield and side window and keyed the entire driver's side of the car.
Earlier, I managed to get in two threatening phone calls to the DA's office and one to the
FBI, while mentioning President Obama as my possible target.
The FBI guy seemed really intense and we had a nice long chat(I guess while he traced
your number etc.) ;In a way, perhaps I should apologize for not killing you ... but I feel
this type of retribution is a far more appropriate punishment for your threatened crime.
I wish you well as you try to sort through some of these rather immediate pressing issues,
and can only hope that you have the opportunity to reflect upon, and perhaps reconsider,
the career path you've chosen to pursue in life.. Remember, next time you might not be so lucky..
Have a good day!
Thoughtfully yours, Semper Fi, Alex
Probably don't have to ask you to forward this one,
it is priceless!